Moving from “What” to “Why”

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 Have you noticed that in the past, if you did something wrong, your Parents or Teachers took you to task for it.  They punished you.  It was YOUR responsibility and YOUR fault.  These days, they don’t focus on the what.  Instead, they want to figure out why.  They don’t blame you, they try to point the finger somewhere else.  Individualism is now dead.  Personal responsibility and accountability has left the building. 

For example, 19 Terrorists fly our planes into buildings killing thousands and the media elite ask why they hate us.  Try these other ones on for size:

  • A thug kills two Police Officers and the local newspaper blames the fact that he lived in a poor community and Section 8 housing. 
  • A couple of demented kids go on a shooting rampage in a school and the media blames bullies, cliques and guns.
  • A drunk driver kills a family and the bar he was at is blamed. 
  • A perp kidnaps and assaults a child and the Shrinks blame past abuse or wound he suffered.
  • Hundreds of school buses sat underwater because the Mayor did not dispatch them to evacuate New Orleans residents before a hurricane hits and the Liberals blame George W. Bush.

Now, I don’t think we should not try to figure out the why sometimes in order to avoid future problems however it is not the main issue nor the most important issue.   Also, above all else, let’s not exonerate the person responsible.  Let’s lay the blame squarely where it belongs.

I remember so well when I was a kid and got in trouble I would try to come up with every excuse.  Most of them were lies but some were true.   In those days, my parents made ME feel guilty.  They didn’t try to excuse the behavior or rationalize it away.  They made sure I knew that it was MY responsibility.  These days, many parents feel guilty and wring their hands over what horrible parents they are if their kid does something wrong.   They pull their hair out and blame themselves instead of turning around and putting the blame on their kid.  They go and drug their kids up or send them to a Shrink instead of dealing with the problem.  These days in fact,  Shrinks are all the rage. Shrinks and drugs.  I love the quote: “Conservatives go to church, Liberals go to Shrinks.”

Yes, I acknowledge that some past experiences or this or that contribute to certain mistakes however, when the day is done and everyone has gone to bed, the bottom line is that the person who did the deed is the one to blame.  Not same lame ass excuse or pyschobabble or George W. Bush or anything else. 

Let’s get a moratorium on the blame game.

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3 Responses to “Moving from “What” to “Why””

  1. cheree Says:

    This is a slight tangent, but if you take it a step further – just on the lack of responsibility, I see major problems for the future.

    The other day on Inside Edition (I hate that I am using them as my source, but I saw this and it really got to me) they aired a story about parents involvement with the job hunting process when their children are graduating from college.

    It seems that parents are going to far as to negotiate their children’s salaries AND calling to complain to bosses if they feel their children aren’t being treated properly. Talk about a lack of responsibility. This is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard of.

    The next thing you know, there will be law suits because a boss actually forced some poor “child” to work. Give me a break.

    The worst part of this is that employers are caving and creating “job packets” to woo parents.

    We need to hold people accountable in all aspects of their lives.

    I am sorry that I can’t find a link to this “news” segment. Here is a link to a USAToday article that is similar: http://www.usatoday.com/money/economy/employment/2007-04-23-helicopter-parents-usat_N.htm

  2. Roland Says:

    I heard about that story (and yes, I also cringe when I use Inside Edition but I have been sucked in as well from time to time). It’s crazy!!!

    Here is a story about responsibility from personal experience that just hit me now. My first job was with Popeye’s Famous Fried Chicken. I worked there for about 6 – 7 months in 11th grade. I decided to quit and so put my 2 week notice in. On my last day I decided to just blow it off since, after all, it was my last day. I went down to my friends house and was hanging out on the front porch with a few friends talking. My Dad pulled up and told me to get in. He then drove me home and made me go into work. He lectured me about committments and responsibility. He was right. I was trying to slack off and it was wrong.
    I was glad he did as a hot chick I liked was working that night too. 🙂

  3. Marty Says:

    We see all kinds here at the college, and sadly, it always comes as a wonderful surprise when a parent takes our side and forces their child to take responsibility. I saw something on the news yesterday about how some parents hire coaches and PR people to help their child do their admissions packets for college, so they can be staged in the best light.

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